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What to do if an adult tells you they’ve been sexually assaulted or raped

It can be really difficult to know what to say if an adult shares with you that they have been sexually assaulted or raped. I always think that they key is ultimately about the following three things: listen, validate, support.

Listen. Give them your full attention in a safe space. Let them use their own words, without rushing them or interrupting.

Validate. Believe and validate the person’s experience and accept that there is no right or wrong way to act following a sexual attack. Crying and shaking, still and silent – all totally normal.

Support. Be there with them whilst they decide on their next steps. Check if they need medical help and support them accessing those services. Remember not to force your opinion of what they ‘should’ do.

At The STAR Centre we have created the following road map to help people respond to a disclosure based on NHS Glasgow and Clyde’s Responding to a disclosure 7min. briefing. We hope you find it helpful.