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Understanding Nightmares, Night Terrors, & Sleep Problems
Our amazing Support Worker, Rhiannon, has pulled together this blog post on nightmares, night terrors, and sleep problems. In this post she explains the difference between nightmares, and night terrors, how they may impact you, and self-care tips for sleep.
[Read Time: 4-5 mins]
Background
It is common for survivors of sexual violence to have sleeping problems. The trauma of sexual violence may lead to nightmares and night terrors. These are more than simply “bad dreams.” You may feel that the attack or an aspect of the abuse is really happening to you in your sleep, and this can be very frightening. If you experience nightmares regularly, it is likely that you will be apprehensive about sleeping. Try to remind yourself that nightmares are an impact of the abuse you experienced. You are not going mad, and it is possible to develop ways of reducing the nightmares and of coping with the after-effects. It can be helpful to try to understand the nightmares as part of your recovery. Your brain is recalling images or sensations which it needs to process before moving on. You may experience any of the impacts noted below:
- Problems getting to sleep, such as lying awake and not being able to fall asleep.
- Problems staying asleep, for example waking up early in the morning or through the night.
- Poor quality sleep so you do not feel refreshed by the sleep you do get.
- Fear of going to sleep and experiencing nightmares.
- Fear of beds and the associations of nighttime.
Nightmares and Night Terrors
You may be experiencing difficulties sleeping due to nightmares or night-terrors (when you are awakened by a flashback) which can result in feeling fearful or panicked.
The first thing to do is remind yourself that nightmares or night-terrors are not real, they are very distressing, but they are a memory of what happened; they are not happening now.
It can be beneficial to keep a diary for your dreams and nightmares to see if there are any patterns. This can help you to identify if they have the same images or content. Talking to someone about these can also help take the image or event out of your head. This may help you feel more in control.
When you wake from a nightmare, try to “ground” yourself in the present. Try to have something warm to drink, watch some tv, listen to some music or do something else that you find relaxing. It’s often best not to try and sleep until you have been able to relax for a while. The Nightmare Diary, which we have included below, can also be helpful for nightmares. You can use it as a ritual before you sleep to prepare for any nightmares you may have, or you could keep it beside your bed ready to use when you need it.
How might Nightmares, Night Terrors and Sleeping Problems Impact me?
Sleeping problems, when they are long term, can affect your emotional and physical health. If you are experiencing nightmares regularly as well as other intrusive thoughts or flashbacks to the abuse, you may feel as if you cannot escape what has happened. This can be a vicious cycle of anxiety, stress and sleeping problems, nightmares, or night-terrors. If this is happening to you, remember it is a natural and common response to an experience of sexual violence.
You may find it beneficial to discuss your ongoing sleeping problems with a professional, including your GP or sleep therapist. Alternatively, you could also reach out to us at the STAR Centre, where we can provide a safe, non-judgemental space for you to process the impacts your experience is having on you.
Self-Care Tips for Sleeping
- Try not to go to bed until you feel tired. It can help to avoid taking naps during the day and to take regular exercise (not within 4 hours of going to bed).
- Check your sleeping arrangements. Think about comfort, temperature, light, and noise levels. If you have something special which you find comforting – a pillow, a teddy, or a photograph – take this to bed with you or have it close by in case you need it.
- Learn to de-stress before bed, for example by having a warm bath and a milky drink. Try to eat early – well before you go to bed – and avoid rich, spicy, or sugar-rich foods, red meat, and cheese.
- If you self-medicate with alcohol or drugs, it may feel as if they help in the short-term. But, over time they can become problematic. It may be helpful to seek medical advice or to find other ways of coping. Even moderate drinking and smoking can affect your quality of sleep.
- Try to get rid of difficult thoughts by writing them down or drawing images which play on your mind. Try to interrupt unwanted thoughts with activities or positive thoughts about a person or place.
- Practice a relaxation technique before you go to bed (yoga, breathing techniques, mindfulness activities).
- Mindfulness is a technique that helps you to focus on the present moment – your breathing, your thoughts, and feelings. Mindfulness helps you to observe your thoughts and feelings without judging yourself to become more aware of any changes in how you see or feel about yourself.
- Try out complementary remedies – meditation, homeopathy, or herbal remedies, such as lavender or valerian may help.
- Don’t try to force sleep. It will only make you feel more anxious. Try keeping your eyes open instead, and as they start to close, tell yourself to resist. The more you try to stay awake the sleepier you’ll become.
- Do not stay in bed. If you cannot sleep, get up after 20 minutes and go through your relaxation routine again.
Remember – if you are struggling and want to talk to someone, you can reach out to us at The STAR Centre via phone (01563 544686), email (admin@starcentreayrshire.org.uk) or via our online form.
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