Blog

Navigating Trauma: Understanding the Brain’s Automatic Responses to Sexual Violence

It can be hard to understand why we reacted the way we did in distressing or traumatic situation, Read our blog below to understand what’s happening in our brain in these situations and why re reacted the way we did. 

[TW: mentions of rape, & sexual violence] 

[Read Time: 2-3 mins]

When we are in danger our brain rings the alarm and prepares the body to respond automatically. When we feel in danger our bodies - 

• Increase the heart rate as well as breathing, which increases blood flow to the muscles. 

• Tightens of muscles, to be ready to be used. 

• Switches off non-survival functions like digestion.

• Sweat, to avoid overheating.

• Releases adrenaline, for a quick burst of energy.

• Releases cortisol, to relieve pain.

By doing this our bodies can then respond to danger in one of 5 ways: fight, flight, freeze, flop, and friend. These responses are automatic and instinctual, they are our brains way of trying to keep us safe and reduce further harm from happening to us.  

Response 1: Fight.  

This can be both physical, such as fighting, pushing, or struggling and verbal e.g., shouting, or saying ‘no’.  

Response 2: Flight.  

Putting distance between yourself and danger by running, backing away, or hiding.  

Because fight or flight are the most known, we can feel confused or angry with ourselves for not developing superhuman strength to fight or run away from the danger. However, the other three responses; freeze, flop, and friend are equally common. And remember, these responses are automatic, we don’t get to choose the ones we experience in the moment.  

Response 3: Freeze.  

Where the body goes rigid and silent. We see this response in the animal kingdom where they freeze to avoid harm or ‘play dead’ so that predators leave them alone. The freeze response is a common response to rape or sexual assault. Freezing is not giving consent; it is an instinctual survival response.  

Response 4: Flop.  

This response is like freezing except instead of your muscles becoming rigid, they go loose and floppy. This reaction can reduce further physical pain from happening. Your mind may also shut off at the same time to protect itself.  

Response 5: Friend.  

This response can be one of two reactions. The first is calling out to a ‘friend’ or bystander for help. The second is where ‘befriending’ the person who’s dangerous, through placating, negotiating, or pleading with them.  

Please remember that our responses to dangerous or traumatic situations are instinctive and automatic. Whether we fight, flee, freeze, flop, or befriend, these reactions are our brain’s way of trying to keep us safe and reduce further harm. It’s natural to feel a range of emotions about how we responded during such intense moments, but it’s crucial to remember that we don’t choose our reactions consciously. Self-blame or guilt serves no purpose in healing from trauma. Instead, acknowledging the instinctive nature of our responses can help foster self-compassion and understanding. Your brain’s primary goal is always your safety and survival, and every reaction, no matter how it may seem in hindsight, is a testament to your resilience in the face of adversity.